Last evening, while watching a 1 hour programme on History channel, I counted 9 ad breaks, each lasting about 3 minutes. Almost all the ads can be classified into 3 groups - mobile phones, women's cosmetics, men's cosmetics. Possibly 1 or 2 ads were outside this, but then exceptions do not make the rule.
My thoughts went back to my school / college days. Back then, at home for men, there was precisely 1 product which can be broadly considered as a cosmetic by a stretch definition - lifebuoy soap. I am referring to the original, un-corrupted version of Lifebuoy which sported a bright red colour, was packaged in a simple white wrapper, and was the size of a brick. Men at home using anything other than Lifebuoy were considered to be profligate in their ways. My grandparents considered Lifebuoy to be a multi purpose soap - for body, clothes as well as shampoo for hair. My grandfather sincerely believed that a bucket of water saturated with lifebuoy soap was a good substitute for fertilizer for coconut trees. That soap mysteriously never used to reduce in size even with vigorous usage, and each cake would last 1 year per person at the minimum, and was considered the best value for money.
Though I studied in a co-ed school, I think the only reason I never had any girl friends in school was because my parents / grandparents ensured that I had a permanent Lifebuoy shied of protection around me - it was a 2 way shield - neither could I step out of it, nor any of the girls could break the defense shield. I think all boys in my class had this defense shield.
Later on, in college, while bravely attempting to expand my intellectual bandwidth to accommodate engineering topics, I considered doing a project on Lifebuoy soap, to figure out its enigmatic chemical bonds - Its aromatic properties can be broadly classified as the exact thin space between deodorant and disinfectant, its longevity that can only be defined by "half life" period, usually reserved for radio active material. Its "multi utility" could have possibly inspired similar concepts in automobile industry. I think Lifebuoy could also have medicinal properties and small pieces of Lifebuoy administered at regular intervals to human beings can function as a broad range anti-biotic - of course, FDA needs to give approval for testing.
Back then, women at home had a choice of soap between Mysore Sandal and Chandrika, and their entire range of cosmetics post bathing was Cuticura or Ponds powder. Period. Mercifully, those were the days when concepts like "gay" were not heard of, and the word "gay" itself retained its original english meaning without any further connotation. Else, I would have been branded "gay", as I used to occasionally escape the tyranny of Lifebuoy, by seeking refuge in a Mysore sandal or Chandrika.
Post bathing, us boys would not even merit a drop of coconut oil on our head, and girls / women used to either use pure coconut oil, or a strange concoction from Kerala called "neelibringadhi" oil. ah...those good old days.
Damn the marketing men, especially from the cosmetics / ad industry who conceive such ads and rudely interrupt a rare good TV programme, by showing a male model with an almost impossible adonis like physique, admiring himself and spraying himself generously with strangely named deodorant called Axe. I curse such ads and models aloud at such moments saying " you pissants...if you call yourself men...show me some guts and try a Lifebuoy ".
My association with lifebuoy continues, with the marketeers of that product having managed to liquify it ( ? ) and selling it as handwash these days. I want to tell them -" you idiots...no need to liquify it. You have a much larger market for the original Lifebuoy - it can substitute poor quality bricks in construction, especially in Chennai."
No comments:
Post a Comment